Last Exit Bali

Paradise Lost

And on the ninth day, thou shalt go to Bali. And so we did.

If you want to check our first stop, Labuan Bajo, you can do so here:

Pink Beaches and Dragons

We were in luck, our villa was very nice, albeit the area wasn’t. Macet gilah, traffic was crazy, esp. in the Seminyak and Canggu area, so much so that it’s better you stay away completely unless you don’t mind the traffic, trash, and pollution. Also, be careful where you walk.

The above sight is the norm wherever we went. Sad but true. If you google Bali, traffic¹, trash² and fire³, you’ll find plenty of reasons to stay away. Still, there’s beauty to be had in Bali, and if you decide to go, maybe go further north instead.

We only stayed for two nights and used the villa as base for our day tour to Ubud and Kintamani before moving to Nusa Dua.

First-day rule: Take it easy, have brunch, don’t go to Sisterfields, walk around a bit, faster on foot than by car, have a coffee, we went to Revolver, which I can’t recommend. The Bali Kintamani single-origin drip coffee, while looking good, was bad.

The quest for the best cup of coffee continues… but not today. Back at the villa, we decided to chill and order Greek food from Santorini, which was OK. The Grab or Gojek app is a lifesaver, so is the e-sim with 30GB data plan we bought for each of our phones.

That night I thought I’d finish my flash fiction piece only to find myself nodding off with the iPad on my lap, and with 48 hours left on the clock, I decided to change the story, or the story decided, or something happened on the way to Ubud the next day, when I was frantically typing away on my iPhone, rewriting that piece of flash fiction, while stuck in traffic.

We missed our ATV slot in Ubud, didn’t wait around and continued to Kintamani, up Mount Batur, another active volcano, last eruption in 2000.

We had a quick late lunch at Okuta, can’t really recommend it for food, but was OK for a quick stop and take in the view (first two images above), before continuing down to the lake, just to take a few pictures before heading back up.

Cafe Ritakala on the other hand is a nice stop to have an iced Caramel Latte with a view. After this, it was time to head to our next place to stay, the Nest, at Nusa Dua, and I still had to write that ending for that Girl with the Magic Light.

But before going to the hotel, we had dinner at the beach at Menega Cafe in Jimbaran, next to Uluwatu. A popular seafood place. A place where you pick your food while it’s still alive, pay by the kilo, lobster, red snapper, grouper, the lot. A crowded place, a very smokey place. You’ll need a change of clothes afterwards, even though you’re sitting at the beach. The food was good, the ambience, though, was not for me. I like to be able to see what I am eating…

It’s a short 20 minutes drive from there to our hotel, and we finally arrived at the Nest a few minutes after ten, checked in and once everyone was ready to call it a night, I closed the sliding door, took the iPad, sat on the sofa and started to write.

I had already gotten rid of the soul-stealing and reaper elements during the drive earlier that morning. The idea of the twin sister, another Elodie origin story, was too strong to ignore, and before I knew it, it was past midnight and the story was done. After some minor editing and proofreading the next morning, the post was scheduled, just in time for a stroll at Nusa Dua Beach.

The Girl With The Magic Light

You may recall the question of cleanliness of the beaches at Nusa Dua. I can attest that they are clean, mostly. Thanks to teams of beach cleaners, working around the clock, to keep the Club Med et al beaches tidy, not only in the morning, but at lunch, after lunch, in the afternoon, basically all the time. Can’t have those resort beaches littered with trash. Who’d pay the premium if they were? In 2022 the G-20 foreign ministers⁴ met in Nusa Dua, better keep it tidy. More or less. I’m afraid to say, there are far better and cheaper beaches closer to home.

You may be wondering, did we enjoy Nusa Dua? Sort of? We didn’t swim. Hardly anyone swam, hardly anyone was there, and this is July we are talking about, I mean… what? The most clean beaches you can get in Bali, and no one’s there? Because it’s boring. Yep. Boring, and the resort guests rather stay in their overpriced resorts next to their tiny pools than on the beach, enjoying overpriced cocktails to the sound of loud music with way too much bass.

Hardly a tourist in sight at Nusa Dua. Reasons? Maybe too pricey for what it has to offer. The three guys in white shirts in the second image below are cleaning the beach.

Despite their best efforts the team of three can’t completely keep the beach plastic and trash-free. On top of that, some people can’t tell the difference between plastic, tin and glass, it’s all the same. The turtle eats it all.

No thanks, I’d rather go to Naxos. Just to clarify, the Nest is not a resort hotel and is located further inland, but still within walking distance to the beach. We enjoyed the room, however, skip their restaurant, The Roost, on the rooftop.

Due to our previously failed ATV mission, we returned to Ubud, diving once more into the crazy Bali traffic. We again were late but managed to get the next slot and that’s when the fun started. That Kuber ATV track is action-packed, steep inclines, tunnels through rock, waterfalls, it has it all, ninety minutes of pure adrenaline.

I got very wet… but not to fret, they have showers, bring a change of clothes. I best not think about the environmental impact our ride had, though.

After that exhausting adventure, we thought we’d revisit a restaurant we remembered fondly from many years ago, and which I recommended not so long ago to my friend

Nathan Slake

: Laka-Leke, famous for their crispy duck.

The restaurant was as we remembered, the food less so. Maybe we were unlucky. The duck, while crispy, was dry, too dry, and so our fond memories were muddled with a sub-par late lunch before we headed to Uluwatu, where a macaque would steal my son’s glasses right off his face, chew off the ends, break out one glass and finally let it go for a handful of nuts. We’ll have to get new glasses… one expensive temple visit.

When on vacation, one should also relax, so the following day we did nothing. Idle at the beach, eat, idle some more, walk around, snap some pictures, and turn in early. Quiet time.

There was this torn bag that escaped the cleaners, made its way to the empty Club Med beach, plastic in the wind…

Time to head back to Jakarta, one last stroll down the beach, grab lunch at Arwana, which was mediocre and overpriced, plus they asked us three times if we were hotel guests, which started to get a little annoying, constantly being queried where we were staying, maybe focus instead on bringing the drinks. Also, if you’re sitting close to the beach (see below), that last row of tables, people will use to sit and smoke there, which may be something to keep in mind if you want to avoid the smell of nicotine while eating.

After lunch, it was time to pack and head back to Jakarta, on our quest for the best sushi and best coffee.

Before I forget, our 54m² suite came with a photoshoot voucher, a pleasant surprise, including a choice of free traditional costumes for each of us and three free images. They had two backdrops set up in their lobby with light boxes, and they had a good photographer to do the shoot, using a Nikon Z fc, albeit with kit lens, still, a very nice free service for their guests. In the end, we liked all the images and chose ten extra for the small price of 300k IDR. Very reasonable, I would say, and well worth it.

In conclusion, while we had a good time overall, we cannot overlook the traffic, trash, and air pollution, which means, we will not be coming back to Bali any time soon.

Next on House Ipfelkofer, Summer is coming…

We will reveal the best sushi places in Jakarta, before we head to Bandung, to escape Jakarta traffic for a few days.

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1. https://www.balinews.co.id/traffic-in-bali-whats-the-story/

2. https://www.balilife.org/crisis-in-bali-the-30-day-plus-blaze-at-tpa-suwung-raises-environmental-alarms-and-spurs-community-solidarity/#:~:text=TPA%20Suwung%2C%20a%2032%2Dhectare,posed%20by%20this%20extended%20blaze.

3. https://thebalisun.com/shocking-footage-shows-mountain-of-trash-burning-in-bali/

4. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/2022_G20_Bali_summit#